Simplifying and prioritizing in your life all begin with developing your core foundation, a vision, a mission, a plan. This is a key foundation for the second step of developing a structure, routine, and schedule for your life. We need to build a foundation. What are your priorities? Are you doing the right things that God has assigned for you? What does this look like in my daily life? Having a mission is a beautiful thing. It brings clarity, purpose, and direction for your life. Every decision and event that comes to the table can be filtered through your personal mission statement.
I began developing my mission statement this last year, and have found it extremely inspiring and beneficial. Two resources I found extremely helpful in the process of developing my mission statement, were Kat’s Mission Statements for Moms and Tell Your Time by Amy Stephens. Here is how I did it:
1. List your Roles.
Start by making a simple list of the important roles that you have been called to fulfill. You start with the question: what the the important roles in my life? Amy Stephens shares, “Your roles are not the same as your activities. Roles are who you are; activities are what you do in your roles.” Then list them in order of priority in your life.
My list is as follows:
1. Self
My body – including mind and soul, need nurturing, rest, and refreshment daily. In order to be effective, joyful, and fruitful in my other roles, I need to prioritize taking good care of myself. This doesn’t mean I am spending hours in front of the mirror. No, I am referring mainly to my soul – nurturing my soul through the Word of God and prayer, followed by exercise of my physical body. These two things are essential for keeping me healthy and fit for the Lord’s use.
2. Spouse
I am Aaron’s wife. He is my husband and the most dear relationship I have in my life. I have committed to being married to him for the rest of my life, and I fully intent, by God’s grace, to carry out my covenant with him. This relationship needs time, attention, and nurturing in order for our marriage to be satisfying and influential. We want to labor together, utilizing both of our skills, for the furtherance of the Kingdom. My husband’s needs come before my children, and I need to constantly evaluate where I am at in this area.
3. Parent
I am the mother of two beautiful children with an additional precious life in the womb. I want to cherish, love and nurture them, as my precious little disciples.
4. Educator
I want to be the primary educator of my children. I want to nurture a love for learning and be actively involved in their education.
5. Homemaker
After the nurturing of my primary relationships, I am primarily responsible for the maintenance of our home. For me, this means I have a goal of maintaining a simple, peaceful home. I am not about perfection, but basic cleanliness, healthy meals, and such.
6. Ambassador for Christ
I am personally passionate about living intentionally to further God’s Kingdom, so I like to detail what this looks like for our family. It is more clearly laid out in our family mission statement, but I am also committed to showing hospitality through our home, offering encouragement through my writing, and striving to inspire others to see the true delight of following hard after Christ.
Other roles that may be on your list: Employee, Student, etc.
2. Dream.
Secondly, I mapped out my main goals in each area of my roles. Part of this was already defined above as I listed out my roles. I sought to dream. What do I want to be known for? How do I want to influence others with my life? What is my main goal in my relationship with Jesus, my spouse, my children, etc?
My mission is:
- To passionately pursue Jesus, by committing every action, thought, and care to His Lordship in my life.
- To passionately love and help my husband by affirming his leadership, meeting his physical needs, and partnering with him in serving the Lord for all our days.
- To cherish, love and nurture our children, acknowledging them as my first ministry, my disciples, to train them to follow Jesus with their whole hearts and serve others for the furtherance of the Kingdom
- To manage my home simply and peacefully, making it a haven of rest and refreshment for my family and anyone the Lord sends our way. To encourage an atmosphere of learning, love, and encouragement in our home, being quick to forgive, extend grace, and invest time in the souls of my children.
- To inspire others to see the beauty and value of following Christ through my writing, hospitality, notes of encouragement, and my life. May every action whisper his name.
3. Define Your Roles.
After defining what was my main goal in preserving each of my roles, I went through each of these roles and asked the question: what specific simple steps can I take to accomplish this dream? What do I want this to look like in my daily life? Think of 3-5 activities that will help you move toward reaching your goals. So again, here is what it looks like in my life:
Self:
Daily time in Bible reading, prayer, and thanksgiving
Regular soul care (sleep, exercise, planning retreat)
Attending church each week
Reading 25 books each year
Spouse:
One on one time with Aaron each day after kids go to bed
Date night at least twice a month
Weekly prayer time together (every Sunday morning for 1 hour)
Annual getaway – schedule a special trip for our anniversary each year
Parent:
Focused, one on one time with each child each day (tea time, games, etc)
Daily devotions at breakfast and dinner time
Rocking, singing, and praying over them before bed
Monthly family outing
Educator:
Four times a week – 30 minute school time with Karis
Library story time each Thursday
Monthly field trip
Craft project once a week
Read books for 1 hour each day
Homemaker:
Prepare healthy quality meals for my family
Clean our home and launder our clothes every Monday
Regular planning retreats on Sat morning (menu plan, errands, to do lists, review goals)
Ambassador for Christ:
Write two blog posts each week
Host hospitality twice a month
Reach out to mothers at library story time and invite to lunch as we develop relationships
Write a note of thanksgiving or encouragement to one person each week
4. Make it Beautiful and Visible!
Write it all out. Make it beautiful. Post it on your walls, in your bedroom, in your home planner. Write it out in calligraphy and post it somewhere special. Keep it visible so it is there to inspire you onwards. Chose a regular time that you can sit down and review your mission and your progress. I have found it extremely helpful to start my weekly planning retreat with this activity. I read through it and then I pray and ask the Lord how I am doing. I then ask: what practical steps can I take this week to strengthen my relationship with the Lord? My husband? My children? I chose just one thing I can do this week. I follow this up by asking: How can I serve others, express thankfulness and/or encouragement to one person this week? And finally, what is one area I need to simplify to provide more peace in our home?
This is the way I seek to make it doable and yet intentional. You might find it helpful to review daily at the start of your day, asking what simple step could you take that very day. Add it to your to-do list. Or you may chose to review once a month. Either way, find a suitable time for review in order that it might stay fresh on your mind and heart, keeping your striving towards the ultimate goal of using your time most effectively for God’s glory.
From my mission statement, I can now map out my daily schedule and routines, which come more naturally once I have defined what I really want to be all about. Stay tuned for what our schedule looks like…
I love how God’s grace is sufficient to pick us up when we stumble and fall. I love how He is there to guide us, to hear our cry’s for purpose and mission, and that He will hear your prayer to develop your own mission statement. Make sure to entrust every step into His care, and He will bless you!
May you be blessed as you seek to develop your own personal mission statement!
I am so thankful for you being brave enough to post this for su all to see! I have been personally working on my personal mission statement as well but haven’t completed it. I have contemplated adding it to my blog once finished but then I’m accountable
It’s only been since this past year that the Lord has really allowed me to see where some of my anxiety and feeling of a lack of purpose comes from. It comes from running circles due to not setting clear goals to fulfill the roles God has given me.
Thanks for sharing!
This was really encouraging! Have you posted what your schedule looks like? I am a stay at home mother of two boys 4 & 1 1/2, and I’m having a hard time scheduling them so that I have some time to do some preschool learning with my four year old. I noticed it isn’t every day that you do learning time with your oldest..Thank you for all of your posts, they are truly a blessing to me!
This is great! I love how you wrote specific ways to live out your Mission Statement! Very helpful!
Thanks!
I love this post and I’m going to do my mission statement right now! Actually I just love this blog – it blesses and challenges me in so many ways – your prayers for me are coveted.
Love from the UK
x
Thank you for this post, i am in need of redefining myself and this is so helpful. You blog is an inspiration, thanks for sharing.
GREAT post!! I have a question about something I’ve been struggling with the last few months. I see that you say, “Clean home and launder cloths every Monday”. How do you get by only doing it once a week? My son is 19 months old and it’s suddenly dawned on me that I spend WAY too much time cleaning (and cooking!). How do mamas balance a clean home w/quality time with your children? I’d appreciate any tips that anyone has to offer! THANKS!
I honestly sweep, vac and mop all the surfaces in our home every Monday morning in addition to cleaning the bathroom. Other than that, I just maintain throughout the week. We do daily pick-ups before bed, but I don’t really do any other extensive cleaning. It just requires too much time and attention, when I could best be directing it elsewhere – usually on my kiddos. I find it is too easy to get caught up in cleaning when I did a bit every day. So I do it in a two hour chunk and we are set for the week. I absolutely love this routine!
Hethir,
I am a stay at home mom of five kids… as much as I love the idea of being able to get deep cleaning and laundry done all in one day of the week, it’s just not possible for me! I do probably 3-5 loads a DAY. =) Because of this, and the way our family works, I have broken down my cleaning/laundry schedule to just do one or two rooms per day and do whichever laundry is in that particular room I am cleaning. I wrote a post about it a while back which you might find helpful: http://www.courageoushomekeeping.com/housekeeping/true-confessions-of-a-terrible-housekeeper/
Every person, every family, every schedule is so different, so just do some research on what other people do and try and combine parts you like until you figure out what will work for you and your family. It definitely takes a lot of trial and error!
Kristi
all very admirable, but take it easy! I got tired just thinking of implementing HALF of those resolutions. Do what you can…
This is a great post. I have been following your blog for a year or two and wanted to say Congratulations on your little one in the womb. I just gave birth to my 5th child last week, and I never ceased to be amazed at these precious gifts from the Lord. Once again, congrats
Here is my mission statement and roles:
Wife: I will pray for him, communicate clearly with him, respect him, try to be attractive to him, and make the time we have alone fun, peaceful, and meaningful.
Mother: I will pray for them, teach them to choose their attitudes wisely, to learn self control, to value hard work, to talk to each other in a way that is loving and kind, and to respect and obey God and their father.
Homemaker: I will be thankful for the home and things that I have. I will keep keep the home peaceful, uncluttered and easy to maintain by putting things away as I use them and implementing some simple habits and routines. I will also have a plan for long term projects and improvements and financial goals.
I loved this! I am in the process of establishing a mission statement and developing a schedule for my family that will support our mission statement!
This was an incredibly encouraging post Lindsay!
PS. Mike Bickle’s series “Power of a Focused Life” on http://www.mikebickle.org go hand in hand with the very thing you just wrote about. It’s amazing!
Have you read this book: http://teachingselfgovernment.com/book-parenting-house-united-changing-childrens-hearts-and-behaviors-teaching-self-governement
Lindsay, this is a phenomenal idea!! I started my roles and goals last night and just finished up the activities to achieve each of them. It really showed me how I’m lacking in effort with my husband. This is going to help me so much to be more intentional with how I allocate my time. Thank you for this post! It was very thought provoking for me… and hey, if major corporations have their employees do this kind of thing each year for work, why shoudn’t we as stay at home mom’s! I hate the thought of stagnating. This is wonderful! God bless you!!
Great post! Thank you, Lindsay.
One of the best ways to nurture and take care of your children is to nurture and take care of your husband. When they see their parents totally in love and respecting and taking care of each other, it gives them a huge sense of security and protection.
Just wondering how you could accomplish all these things with a nursing baby….I only have one right now (2.5 mo) and I often find it hard to even get just one load of laundry done per day! Any tips for having a fruitful day while not wearing yourself out?
The baby is nursing what every 3-4 hrs? And the baby still sleeps a lot. So, what are you doing while the baby sleeps? Besides sleeping yourself
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Sierra, when I had little ones (I’m a momma of 7, and nursed all of them till they were about 1 years old), I often used a baby carrier or sling. It’s amazing what a woman can accomplish, even with a precious nursing baby at her side! I got used to doing lots of things one-handed. The first few months are very exhausting (especially when nursing is frequent and all through the night), Your body is recuperating and even though a baby sleeps off and on, I’ve always laughed when people say they “slept like a baby” — they haven’t had a newborn in a while!!!
Bless you, dear mother. Oh, and something else that’s helped me is doing a few loads of laundry FIRST THING when I wake up. Sometimes it’s also good to set a timer for about a 1/2 hour, so you can go switch the wash to the dryer, and then again to get the load ALL THE WAY done (I have a rod above our washer to hang clothes up immediately with bins for clean socks, underwear, and washcloths). You can do it!!!
Sierra, I agree with Ann. A baby carrier is essential during those early months. But make sure you are resting when baby naps. That is important to recover from your birth. You are still early in the recovery, and it is important to keep things simple. But using a Moby wrap (my favorite) was so helpful, because baby stays happy and mommy’s hands are free to do the basic household management.
Sierra,
Please do not compare yourself to others. Babies really are different from each other, and some make it very difficult to do anything other than care for them. My first had stomach issues we did not get diagnosed until 18 months, and sometimes I cried with her. She was MUCH harder than my next two babies. Do your best, and love your little one.
On the other hand, sometimes if they are going to be crying anyway, lay the little one on the bed, talk and sing to her, and get that laundry folded.
Do your best, sing lots of praise songs, and it will get easier.
I was inspired by your first post about developing a family mission statement to finish ours. It’s amazing how much thought it takes, but we finally finished. I have to say I love how you made yours personal. Ours is more of a “unit” mission which made it difficult to fashion. I may have to go back and re-do one for me and how cool it would be to have my daughter do this a few times as she grows. We plan to have ours carved into wood and I also like the idea of reciting it in the mornings during devotion/prayer time.
It is the (surname) Family Mission:
- To serve and obey God as we fulfill His purpose for our lives
- To foster a loving environment where we can grow & learn without fear of retribution
- To glorify God with our daily living and share God’s love with those around us
- To support and help each other as we embrace each other’s strengths and learn from each other
- To practice forgiveness and allow God’s love to unify us as a family
So deeply grateful for the reminder that, though we live by grace, it is not a passive existence.
Lindsay!!!
I LOVE this post (and YOU!!!). I’m actually printing it out so I can take my time to refect on all the details. What a beautiful example of putting everything down clearly, so you can ensure that your daily to-do’s (along with what others may ask of you) line up with God’s call on your life. Something I’ve found is that our mission and purpose needs to be reviewed on a regular basis — as least yearly, but often even on a quarterly basis. Sometimes, we may think a particular ministry or activity is a part of our LIFE calling, but sometimes, they’re just for a season.
This is a wonderful post. I have read “Tell your time” and have started this process but would love to go in more detail as you have. You have been such an inspiration to me lately as I have been searching to simplify my life and am ready to try your deodorant and toothpaste recipes. I have also learned so much about essential oils and I bought coconut oil after reading your posts. So thank you for your encouragement through your blog.
Well written, practical, and so well laid out! Thank you! You’ve challenged me to be more intentional in my relationships.
I love this. You are doing such a wonderful job living a purposeful life. Thanks for sharing!
Thanks for the wonderful advice. Within the past year or so I created a planning notebook based on part by one of your old posts and a time management session I attended at church. Much of how I structure my planning and prioritizing looks like what you just described, and it works great. I’d like to encourage all of your readers to give it a try for themselves too. Blessings!
Umm WOW! super post… I’m just speechless and amazed. You are so inspirational and I am so glad to follow such a wonderful blog. What church does your family go to?
We attend The Gathering Community Church in Portland.
Can you elaborate on why you put your husband’s needs before your children? Young children are not able to care for themselves so my belief is that their needs should be met before the needs of one’s self and one’s spouse. Adults should put the children’s basic needs before their own. This is only my opinion though.
it’s Biblical. Your husband was there before your children. So he comes first. Children will be fine for a few minutes or whatever. Children don’t need their parents to entertain them 24/7. babies can be put in a crib/bassinet, older children can color or whatever.
I still have to disagree with you on this When we were out hiking and got hungry and had limited food, we offered it to our children before taking some for ourselves. When we got caught in a bad rain storm, we took off our coats to make sure our kids were dry amd warm. The childrens’ basis needs should always come before an adult. Any Christian man I know would want to make sure his children’s basic needs of food, clothing, and shelter were met before his.
I don’t think the previous poster was suggesting making your child go hungry while you have a snack. Obviously, there are times when we sacrifice our own wants to give our children what they need.
Putting one’s husband first *is* Biblical, and it is a general lifestyle. It is in the little things, like having your child wait to speak when their father is speaking at the dinner table, instead of allowing them to interrupt. It means leaving them with a babysitter once a month to have a date-night with your husband (even if it makes you uncomfortable to do so). It means making sure you have enough energy at the end of the day to take care of your husband’s physical needs. Of course, one can always ask God for His wisdom to come up ways that they can honor their husband and make him feel like their #2 priority (right behind God).
Thank you Autumn and of course there are extenuating situations. But as a RULE, your husband comes first.
Thank you Autumn. There are certainly times when we must meet our children’s needs before our own. That is not the point here. It is the heart of the matter. Our children must realize they are not the centre of the world. We must be intentional in investing in our marriage relationships as husband and wife, especially when our children are young and time-consuming. Not only does healthy parenting require a healthy marriage, it will also reinforce for your child that they’re not the centre of the world. The examples Autumn shared were excellent and definitely what I was implying.
Thanks for you examples. I see where you are all coming from now and understand. Definitely agree with you.
I can’t tell you how much I loved this, Lindsay! Being intentional in all things is something that I know I lack in… this was great advice for those of us who struggle with this. Thank you!