Christa's gift of decorating shines forth at the Valentine's Dessert
In light of our book study on the topic of Hospitality, I requested my dear sister, Christa, to share how the Lord has been using her in demonstrating hospitality as a single woman. She also includes some thoughts on how parents can encourage their daughters in this area. May this post encourage all young ladies out there to the great potential you have to impact the lives of others during this precious season! Christa blogs regularly over at Empowered Traditionalist.
It was our Valentines Dessert banquet, the tables were set, the candles lit, refreshments ready to be poured. I surveyed the dining room; there was three days worth of preparation in front of me. What if something goes wrong? Is the cheesecake too dry? Do we have enough drinks?
If you’ve ever entertained as a single young woman, I’m sure you can relate to the nervous panic attacks right before the guests arrive. Extending hospitality while single can be intimidating, but like any worthwhile skill, it just takes practice.
My siblings (Brooke, Kelly & Brandon) help serve at the dessert
The Ministry of Hospitality
We, as single women, have such a precious opportunity to extend hospitality to those around us. I am reminded of Proverbs 31, “She extends her hand to the needy”, we are in a special season that allow us more liberty to reach out and nurture others through our home. Neighbors, co-workers, relatives, single mothers, needy families – all of these are prime recipients. Have you ever fed a bunch of single guys? Talk about grateful recipients- girls this is a ministry! (who knows what doors may open up? 
LOL)
Home-maker Preparation
Not only can this be a dynamic ministry as a single woman, it is also key preparation for being a hospitable wife. The ability to extend gracious hospitatliy doesn’t suddenly materialize when you get married- no, it takes practice and experience. Use your single years to figure out what works for certain events, how to create dynamic conversation and a sequence of events, what games to include, décor, and how to prepare a simple dinner or a four course feast!
Include Others
Get your friends and family involved in your hospitality. Singles, in particular, love to come and help beforehand. Work together, the memories are priceless. Our Valentines Banquet was certainly a family affair, I administrated while my brothers donned their servers uniforms, and us girls busied ourselves in the kitchen work. My parents took charge of the program and everything went as smooth as silk. (course there was that chocolate disaster in the kitchen…but we won’t mention that. )
The guests enjoy themselves at the dessert
Start Small
This isn’t rocket science. Take baby steps, don’t bite off more than you can chew. Perhaps the first step is something as simple as preparing ice tea for your neighbor after they finished mowing the lawn, or inviting the neighbor kids over for cookies. (Think of the ministry possibilities- become known as Aunty “Christa” who always has cookies ready after school!)
Parents and Hospitality
Mom and Dad play a significant role in launching their daughters into the world of gracious hospitality. My personal outreach is a natural progression of my parents demonstrating meaningful generosity repeatedly when I was growing up. A few ways parents can foster hospitality and support their daughters in ministry:
-Fund or underwrite the cost of the events. (food is expensive
-make yourselves available to serve. My Mom was always ready to lend a hand in the kitchen and Dad has often led a short devotional or conversation time.
-When birthdays or special events role around, look for gifts that will aid in hospitality. Cute aprons, cookbooks, serving dishes, specialty cookware/bakeware. My favorite wok was a Christmas gift and it has been used at many a party since
-Open your home. If your daughter doesn’t live at home, utilize your home as a dinner or event location.
-Encourage and Problem solve. There will be kitchen disasters and awkward moments, press through, pointing out the positive and making notes for the future.
Keep it Practical
-Plan ahead and keep your shopping list handy so you can procure the groceries when convenient.
-Keep a Hospitality notebook. Running lists of games and ideas for the different events you host.
-Keep the cooking simple, it’s about the guests not the display.
-Don’t be afraid to make mistakes. It rarely goes exactly as you planned, and even the best cooks have food disasters- just enjoy the journey and don’t give up.
-PRAY, bathe your event in prayer, particularly that your guests would leave built up and feel the love of Christ.
Hospitality is incredibly fun and very rewarding. Once you start you’ll never stop.
As a not so young Christian single woman one tip that I can give if parents aren’t available to help out – pick a close friend and set up an arrangement to help each other out with hospitality. When you cook and host have your friend round to answer the door, hand round the drinks. My biggest tip for any single hospitality is do not over stretch yourself. Pick meals that can be prepared ahead, frozen – and finally thawed, quickly cooked on the evening. Have a desert that is quick and simple but can be displayed to its best advantage in a pretty glass – my favourite is Greek yoghurt and honey with grapes mixed through and then grated dark chocolate on top. Look on hospitality as your Christian duty as well as a joy and pleasure. For younger women it can be a good preparation for marriage – for older women it can be a preparation for the sweet fellowship of heaven, a chance to give of ourselves in the name of Christ.
Thanks for this great post! I’ve really been exercised in this area lately, as a single young woman. The Lord allowed me to get to a point of feeling pretty lonely one evening, and it made me think of those who are so often forgotten in hospitality, like the elderly. What a joy it is to invite an elderly widow or friend over for a meal; they just soak it in and feel so special to be invited over! Thanks for this encouragement to show love to His Name by ministering to others!
I love that this was posted. I am a married women whose husband works for a ministry where I have the opportunity to minister to many young single women. I am always looking for information from Godly single women on how to live the Titus 2 model of womanhood in the God given gift of singleness. These finds are treasures that I am always quick to pass on. Thank you for sharing!
Christa,
This post really blessed me as a mom of two little girls. Thank you especially for the tips for parents. I’m sure your parents are really proud and thankful to God that their hard work has paid off. Thank you for being an example in the faith to girls across the country.
Many Blessings,
Shannon (in Texas)
What a beautiful gift you have, Christa! You have an incredible eye of detail. Thank you for sharing on the importance of hospitality as a single woman. It is important to remember that single women have just as much value on their own as well as when one is married. Bless you as you seek to serve Him in all the stages of life.
What a beautiful table set, what a wonderful post! This post is a great reminder that learning hospitality as a single woman will allow you to be a blessing to your community in a way a married mom (and her limited time) never could.
What a fabulous post! I SO need to be reminded of this ministry, and also to include my boys in on it!