Music & Marriage: Harmonizing the Roles

While teaching piano this past week I was prompted by a little analogy in our music session that really stood out to me. We were working on the importance of balance between the hands, as there are normally two distinct parts to music, melody and accompaniment. We are always searching the music and tones to discover which hand has the melody at any given time, as it should come out singing above the accompaniment in the other hand.

They are both very important parts to convey the full harmony of the song. Although the melody is often more prominent than the accompaniment, without the accompaniment and background harmonies the melody has no support or fullness. It does not sound as rich and beautiful without this proper balance.

Likewise, in comparison, in a marriage relationship we have two very equally important roles between a husband and a wife, but each has a completely different function. Without one or the other we do not have the full array of beauty and design that God created to be displayed in the marriage relationship, which is then a reflection of the Father and Son’s relationship in the Trinity. If the roles are reversed and the woman is showing disrespect in her attitude towards her husband to such an extend that he feels unworthy and unable to lead his family, we have a conflict of balance. It will sound more like a train wreck than sweet music.

Now every analogy has its falling point, but I do believe God has designed the husband to be the leader and protector of the family, a role that will be more prominent as the melody in music. He is the leader, he is the man of the house. He is to be known in the gates! But without the proper support of the accompaniment, his bride, serving to be his helpmate, encouraging him in his calling, and meeting his needs, he will not find such greatness. He must have a good woman behind him cheering him on.

The irony of this relationship is that being the accompaniment as a woman sounds like such a low position in the eyes of the world. But again, the symphony behind the solo instrument may appear small and insignificant on the recording but when you see it in live performance you couldn’t image the solo instrument sounding like anything without the background of all the different instruments and tones supporting it.The woman and any children that may spring from this relationship are called to a high position of supporting and believing in the man they are following. With this support, that man will go for.

It is only when I fully surrender to God’s beautiful design and harmony for marriage that I find the greatest delight in fulfilling my role as the accompaniment. It is there at Christ’s feet in submission to my husband that I find my greatest joy and purpose. There is no better place for me than to support and serve my husband!

When we work together in God’s design, our marriage will be as music to the world!